Either you get complacent because you assume that you’re so far out of your partner’s league that he or she would do anything to jeopardize the relationship – and thus quickly find out just how wrong you are – or you become so convinced that your partner is going to realize that they could do better and drop you like a bad habit that you end up subconsciously pushing them away.
Of course, everyone on the Internet took this in without even blinking, accepting that people are complex and varied in their desires and understanding that attraction is a complicated beast. To judge by the collective outrage over the episode, you would’ve thought that Dunham had murdered Ned Stark while dressed as Hitler and simultaneously shooting kittens out of a cannon that was also on fire.
(credit: Jaguar PS / Shutterstock.com)" src=" width="333" height="500" srcset=" sizes="(max-width: 333px) 100vw, 333px" / Now, late to the party as I may be, I have to say that this does bring up the ever-popular topic of whether it’s possible to date someone who is “out of your league”.
It’s impossible – or so the assumptions go – that perhaps she’s legitimately attracted to him, that attractiveness and desire are about more than just the accepted definitions of good looks.
We get so hung up on beauty privilege, the halo effect, the value of facial symmetry and waist-to-hip ratios and the idea that only 20% of whomever get 80% of the fucking that we tend to ignore things that don’t fit the accepted narrative.
Women go gaga for Matt Smith and Arthur Davil and Benedict Cumberbatch..
Nobody’s denying that someone who’s conventionally attractive is going to have a leg up on getting a leg over. We don’t just date people’s faces or torsos – not for very long, in any case. Looks, no matter how spectacular, eventually become part of the status quo; as Billy Bob Thornton (no model, he) once said about being married to Angelina Jolie, eventually “it’s like fucking the couch.” Like I said earlier, when we see someone dating somebody who’s supposedly “out of their league”, our default assumption is that it’s that the uglier of the two is rich; Anna-Nicole Smith marrying octogenarian billionaire J.I challenge you to visit any Latin club and watch the So clearly if you don’t look like a Greek God, the best option is to be insanely talented, right? Now allow me to spare you the immediate and obvious rejoinder: “So why’s Brad Pitt with Angelina Jolie instead of some nobody, then? Sure, there are millions of women who’d cheerfully murder a hobo for a chance to him…but how many do you suppose could actually put up with the lifestyle that his career requires?And, importantly, he made women Small wonder that so many of his mistresses were also his models; he made them feel beautiful. Perhaps it’s the fact that you just after all, someone who looks amazing but doesn’t connect with you is going to leave you feeling cold and unappreciated.Dancing is another talent that often overcomes looks. these are all incredibly attractive skills to have to be sure, but they’re hardly the end-all, be-all of attraction. Someone who makes you feel good, who is fun to be around, is going to be in demand as a lover, far more so than someone who is pretty, but distant and unapproachable. The nobody would never be able to keep up with him, relate to him, or otherwise be part of his life the way that Angelina (or Jennifer Anniston or any of his other exes) could. Brad Pitt is a working actor; this puts him in a see the months of living in the ass-end of nowhere when filming on location, spending time away from one’s family and friends, the 4 AM call times, the fourteen-to-twenty hour days, the mind numbing tedium between takes and the unending press junkets to promote the film after it’s finished.Be your authentic self, not some false front based on the idea of what you think you need to be.